{"id":933,"date":"2010-10-22T17:55:57","date_gmt":"2010-10-22T15:55:57","guid":{"rendered":"http:\/\/happy2travel.eu\/sk\/?p=933"},"modified":"2019-02-19T01:21:11","modified_gmt":"2019-02-18T23:21:11","slug":"den-jeden","status":"publish","type":"post","link":"https:\/\/happy2travel.eu\/sk\/den-jeden","title":{"rendered":"De\u0148 jeden"},"content":{"rendered":"

Vyst\u00fapil som v nepr\u00edjemnom mramorovom podzem\u00ed. Smrad\u013eav\u00fd ma\u010farsk\u00fd vlak n\u00e1hle op\u00e4\u0165 zmizol v jednom z tmav\u00fdch tunelov stanice. Prist\u00fapila ku mne mlad\u00e1 po\u010dern\u00e1 \u017eena s nadv\u00e1hou.
\n\u2013 Ratuj ma, P\u00e1nko, dnes som e\u0161te nejedla.
\n\u2013 <\/em>Odp\u00e1\u013e.<\/em><\/span><\/p>\n

\u017dena hrozivo natrasie sukne a zmizne. Zh\u013ead\u00favam svoju bato\u017einu, vylo\u017e\u00edm si na chrb\u00e1t ruksak a cestou m\u00ed\u0148am mlad\u00fa po\u010dern\u00fa \u017eenu s nadv\u00e1hou.<\/span><\/p>\n

\u2013 Ratuj ma, Pani, dnes som e\u0161te nejedla.<\/em> Babka s dedkom s\u00fa v rozpakoch. Chv\u00ed\u013eu ml\u010dia, akoby ni\u010d. \u017dena na nich vy\u010d\u00edtavo h\u013ead\u00ed. Dedko si vzdychne a uk\u00e1\u017ee pomaran\u010d, babka sa zahanb\u00ed, nave\u013ea-nave\u013ea vylov\u00ed z kabelky lepeniak.
\n\u2013 Peniaze nem\u00e1\u0161?<\/em> Vydrapne pomaran\u010d a lepeniak, ktor\u00fd hne\u010f ostentat\u00edvne vyhod\u00ed do ko\u0161a. \u2013 Kurva star\u00e1 lakom\u00e1.<\/em><\/span><\/p>\n

\"N\u00e1kupn\u00fd<\/a>Na schodoch sa zraz\u00edm s rockerom.
\n\u2013 Vitaj doma, Pane!<\/em> Nebudem \u0165a zdr\u017eiava\u0165. Daj mi zlatku na v\u00edno a budeme kres\u0165ania.
\n<\/em>Vzdychnem si, obr\u00e1tim sa k v\u00fdchodu a zap\u00ednam zmie\u0161an\u00fd pankov\u00fd ch\u00f3r, ktor\u00fd prehlu\u0161\u00ed v\u00f4ne a zvuky ve\u013ekomestsk\u00e9ho podzemia. Na povrchu je sk\u00fape slnko, chladn\u00fd vietor a zast\u00e1vka. Gang pasa\u017eierov-vreck\u00e1rov si ma nev\u0161\u00edma. S\u00fa v pr\u00e1ci. V autobuse som takmer s\u00e1m, okrem dvoch mu\u017eov, ktor\u00ed sa na p\u013eaci Narutovi\u010da zmenia na rev\u00edzorov. V tomto meste ma e\u0161te rev\u00edzor nechytil. Pod\u00e1vam mu jednorazov\u00fd l\u00edstok spred dvoch t\u00fd\u017ed\u0148ov m\u00ednus dvadsa\u0165dva hod\u00edn. Mu\u017e pozer\u00e1 sk\u00famavo na l\u00edstok, na m\u0148a, na bato\u017einu (pokuta navy\u0161e). Pod\u00e1va mi l\u00edstok a odch\u00e1dza. Spomenul som si na rockerovo Vitaj doma, Pane.<\/span><\/p>\n

\n\t\t

\n\t\t\t \t\n \"Pri\n \t<\/a>\n\t\t <\/div>\n Na Z\u00e1kopovej je pusto, len skupinky veriacich pr\u00fadia do svojich kostolov a n\u00e1kupn\u00fdch centier. Nede\u013en\u00e9 slnko povieva \u017elt\u00fdmi listami stromov, vl\u00e1dne pokoj a pr\u00edjemn\u00e1 melanch\u00f3lia. Rozm\u00fd\u0161\u013eam, pre\u010do vlastne o tom p\u00ed\u0161em. Aha, u\u017e viem. Z vlastnej m\u00e1rnivosti.<\/span><\/p>\n

Pred nieko\u013ek\u00fdmi rokmi som sa vr\u00e1til z cesty okolo sveta a z kult\u00farneho \u0161oku z Eur\u00f3py som sa zotavoval v malom zabudnutom meste\u010dku na juhov\u00fdchode Po\u013eska. \u010cl\u00e1nky o jednotliv\u00fdch krajin\u00e1ch z n\u00e1\u0161ho blogu vtedy tr\u00f3nili na prv\u00fdch poz\u00edci\u00e1ch vyh\u013ead\u00e1va\u010dov a py\u0161ne som si predstavoval, kto v\u0161etko o n\u00e1s vie. Ke\u010f ste na prv\u00fdch miestach vyh\u013ead\u00e1va\u010dov pre tak\u00e9 d\u00f4le\u017eit\u00e9 k\u013e\u00fa\u010dov\u00e9 slov\u00e1, ako s\u00fa n\u00e1zvy kraj\u00edn, denne si na v\u00e1s klikn\u00fa tis\u00edce \u013eud\u00ed. \u00daplne n\u00e1hodou ma zrazu napadlo zisti\u0165, \u010do sa zobraz\u00ed, ak na slovenskom internete zad\u00e1m slovo \u201ePo\u013esko\u201c. Jasn\u00e9, \u017ee na\u0161a str\u00e1nka tam nebola. O Po\u013esku sme nenap\u00edsali ani jedin\u00fd \u010dl\u00e1nok. Napokon, pre\u010do by som mal p\u00edsa\u0165 o Po\u013esku, ke\u010f m\u00f4\u017eem o Bol\u00edvii alebo Kambod\u017ei?<\/span><\/p>\n

\"Var\u0161avsk\u00e1<\/a>Na prvom mieste bola oblig\u00e1tna wiki so \u0161kol\u00e1ckym textom pln\u00fdm pravopisn\u00fdch ch\u00fdb. Na druhom \u2013 odkaz s n\u00e1zvom \u201ePo\u013esko, krajina negat\u00edvnych z\u00e1\u017eitkov.\u201c I\u0161lo o blog bratislavsk\u00e9ho puber\u0165\u00e1ka Petra, ktor\u00fd sa raz vybral do Krakova na koncert Prodigy a mal tam sam\u00e9 negat\u00edvne z\u00e1\u017eitky. Nemilosrdn\u00fd algoritmus vyh\u013ead\u00e1va\u010da ho za to umiestnil na druh\u00e9 miesto v zozname relevantn\u00fdch inform\u00e1ci\u00ed pre ka\u017ed\u00e9ho Slov\u00e1ka, ktor\u00fd by sa chcel nie\u010do o Po\u013esku dozvedie\u0165. Dostal som vtedy z\u00e1chvat z\u00farivosti.<\/span><\/p>\n

Predstavil som si svojich priate\u013eov z Po\u013eska, ktor\u00ed poznaj\u00fa Slovensko lep\u0161ie, ako v\u00e4\u010d\u0161ina obyvate\u013eov Petr\u017ealky. Spisovate\u013ea Andreja Stasiuka a jeho knihy, \u010dl\u00e1nky, texty o Slovensku. Predstavil som si ich v\u0161etk\u00fdch v ko\u017ei puber\u0165\u00e1ka Pe\u0165a, ktor\u00fd sa nevedel vymota\u0165 z tunela pod krakovskou stanicou, stret\u00e1val otrhan\u00fdch \u013eud\u00ed, \u010dudn\u00fdch<\/em> po\u013esk\u00fdch fan\u00fa\u0161ikov a tak. Predstavujem si teda, \u017ee Pe\u0165o je pre zmenu Poliak, respekt\u00edve \u017ee moji Poliaci s\u00fa v ko\u017ei Pe\u0165a. Vystupuj\u00fa v Spi\u0161skom Podhrad\u00ed z otl\u010den\u00e9ho smrad\u013eav\u00e9ho vlaku a zabl\u00fadia do r\u00f3mskej osady plnej sra\u010diek, ru\u00edn a bordelu. Potom pr\u00eddu domov a nap\u00ed\u0161u na internete \u010dl\u00e1nok: Slovensko, krajina fetuj\u00facich det\u00ed.<\/span><\/p>\n

\n\t\t

\n\t\t\t \t\n \"Var\u0161ava,\n \t<\/a>\n\t\t <\/div>\n Je to nere\u00e1lna predstava, preto\u017ee t\u00edto \u013eudia dobre vedia o fetuj\u00facich de\u0165och v slovensk\u00fdch osad\u00e1ch, nepova\u017euj\u00fa to v\u0161ak za na\u0161u kult\u00farnu \u010drtu, ale za soci\u00e1lny probl\u00e9m. Slovensko je pre Poliakov krajina kr\u00e1snych h\u00f4r a miest, priate\u013esk\u00fdch \u013eud\u00ed a dobrej ly\u017eova\u010dky. Na\u0161u krajinu nestoto\u017e\u0148uj\u00fa s fetuj\u00facimi de\u0165mi, ani s nev\u013e\u00fadnymi stanicami a otrasnou obsluhou v re\u0161taur\u00e1ci\u00e1ch. Keby sa aj niekto tak\u00fd na\u0161iel, ni\u010d mu to nepom\u00f4\u017ee: v ten de\u0148 som e\u0161te pre zmenu nap\u00edsal po po\u013esky k\u013e\u00fa\u010dov\u00e9 slovo \u201eSlovensko\u201c na po\u013eskom internete a zobrazili sa mi informa\u010dn\u00ed sprievodcovia, stovky po\u013esk\u00fdch \u010dl\u00e1nkov o skvel\u00fdch miestach a tipoch na cestovanie, ponuky na ubytovanie. Negat\u00edvne z\u00e1\u017eitky nemali \u0161ancu.<\/span><\/p>\n

Dnes je v\u0161etko inak. Internet zosivel, blogy boli vytla\u010den\u00e9 marketingov\u00fdmi str\u00e1nkami, ktor\u00e9 na slovenskom aj po\u013eskom Webe omie\u013eaj\u00fa tie ist\u00e9 inform\u00e1cie o oboch krajin\u00e1ch. Blog s \u010dl\u00e1nkom o negat\u00edvnych z\u00e1\u017eitkoch u\u017e d\u00e1vno zmizol. Ak som teda chcel dosiahnu\u0165, aby mal slovensk\u00fd internet na v\u00fdber, \u010do si chce o Po\u013esku pre\u010d\u00edta\u0165, pri\u0161iel som neskoro, ako v\u017edy.<\/span><\/p>\n

\n\t\t

\n\t\t\t \t\n \"Dedinsk\u00fd\n \t<\/a>\n\t\t <\/div>\n Autobus napokon zab\u00e1\u010da z Dedinskej a prech\u00e1dza okolo pravosl\u00e1vneho cintor\u00edna. Vystupujem pri tehlovom kostole, ktor\u00e9ho patr\u00f3nom je ak\u00fdsi transvestita s f\u00fazikmi po antikoncep\u010dn\u00fdch tabletk\u00e1ch. M\u00ed\u0148am kebab; poch\u00f4dzk\u00e1ri si tu vymie\u0148aj\u00fa v\u00edkendov\u00e9 z\u00e1\u017eitky s d\u00edlermi. Na chodn\u00edku pred kebabom stoj\u00ed \u010dierny ojazden\u00fd mercedes. \u0160PZ nos\u00ed n\u00e1pis GO KABUL.<\/span><\/p>\n

Kr\u00e1\u010dam vpred. Za chrbtom m\u00e1m ulicu \u017dofkinho pr\u00e1poru, ktor\u00fd kedysi udr\u017eal Dedinu nieko\u013eko t\u00fd\u017ed\u0148ov proti rojom \u0160v\u00e1bov. Ale tomu na\u0161inec nerozumie \u2013 najprv by musel pozna\u0165 krvav\u00fa hist\u00f3riu tohto mesta.<\/span><\/p>\n

A vtedy ma to napadlo: vlastne, pre\u010do nie. Sta\u010d\u00ed sa poobzera\u0165 okolo seba: sam\u00e1 exotika. Ur\u010dite to niekto bude chcie\u0165 \u010d\u00edta\u0165. Nejak\u00fd na\u0161inec, teda.
\n<\/span><\/p>\n

\n\t\t

\n\t\t\t \t\n \"Ulicami\n \t<\/a>\n\t\t <\/div>\n Pred ulicou T\u00f3na Rozpra\u0161ova\u010da sa chodn\u00edk men\u00ed na pieskovisko. Za pieskoviskom treba e\u0161te prejs\u0165 lah\u00f4dky \u0160panielsky vt\u00e1\u010dik, z\u00e1hrady a vr\u00e1tnika. U\u017e som takmer tu. Prech\u00e1dzam dvorom, v\u00fd\u0165ah ma vyvezie hore. K\u013e\u00fa\u010d strk\u00e1m do z\u00e1mku; nepasuje. Pekn\u00e9 diev\u010da otv\u00e1ra dvere.
\n\u2013 \u010co tu chce\u0161<\/em>. Rezignovane sa obraciam na odchod, ke\u010f ma tepl\u00e1 ruka vtiahne dovn\u00fatra a zatreskne za mnou dvere.
\n\u2013 Vitaj doma, Pane<\/em>.<\/span><\/p>\n","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":"

Vystupujem v\u00a0nepr\u00edjemnom podzem\u00ed var\u0161avskej hlavnej stanice.\u00a0Smrad\u013eav\u00fd ma\u010farsk\u00fd vlak n\u00e1hle op\u00e4\u0165 zmizol v\u00a0jednom z tmav\u00fdch tunelov. Prist\u00fapila ku mne mlad\u00e1 po\u010dern\u00e1 \u017eena s\u00a0nadv\u00e1hou.<\/br>\u2013 Ratuj ma, P\u00e1nko, dnes som e\u0161te nejedla. \u2013 Odp\u00e1\u013e.<\/br>\u017dena hrozivo natrasie sukne a\u00a0zmizne. Zh\u013ead\u00favam svoju bato\u017einu, vylo\u017e\u00edm si na chrb\u00e1t ruksak a\u00a0cestou m\u00ed\u0148am mlad\u00fa po\u010dern\u00fa \u017eenu s\u00a0nadv\u00e1hou.<\/br>\u2013 Ratuj ma, Pani, dnes som e\u0161te nejedla. Dedko si vzdychne a\u00a0uk\u00e1\u017ee pomaran\u010d, babka vylov\u00ed z\u00a0kabelky lepeniak.<\/br>\u2013 Peniaze nem\u00e1\u0161? Vydrapne pomaran\u010d a\u00a0lepeniak, ktor\u00fd hne\u010f vyhod\u00ed do ko\u0161a.<\/br>\u2013 Kurvy star\u00e9 lakom\u00e9.<\/p>\n","protected":false},"author":1,"featured_media":956,"comment_status":"closed","ping_status":"closed","sticky":false,"template":"","format":"standard","meta":{"ngg_post_thumbnail":0},"categories":[355,330],"tags":[428,263,274,262],"_links":{"self":[{"href":"https:\/\/happy2travel.eu\/sk\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/933"}],"collection":[{"href":"https:\/\/happy2travel.eu\/sk\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts"}],"about":[{"href":"https:\/\/happy2travel.eu\/sk\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/types\/post"}],"author":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/happy2travel.eu\/sk\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/users\/1"}],"replies":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/happy2travel.eu\/sk\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/comments?post=933"}],"version-history":[{"count":9,"href":"https:\/\/happy2travel.eu\/sk\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/933\/revisions"}],"predecessor-version":[{"id":8087,"href":"https:\/\/happy2travel.eu\/sk\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/933\/revisions\/8087"}],"wp:featuredmedia":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/happy2travel.eu\/sk\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/media\/956"}],"wp:attachment":[{"href":"https:\/\/happy2travel.eu\/sk\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/media?parent=933"}],"wp:term":[{"taxonomy":"category","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/happy2travel.eu\/sk\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/categories?post=933"},{"taxonomy":"post_tag","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/happy2travel.eu\/sk\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/tags?post=933"}],"curies":[{"name":"wp","href":"https:\/\/api.w.org\/{rel}","templated":true}]}}